I sincerely hope and pray that you all had a very blessed Christmas. Mine was unusual compared to those of the past, but nonetheless it was probably one of the best I've had. My children were home with me most of the time. We shared our holiday with my brother and his lovely family. AND I kept my concentration on the reason for the season. For those reasons, I greatly enjoyed Christmas.
Michael managed to sit through dinner with my brother's family on Christmas Eve. He also made it through opening presents on Christmas morning before returning to bed. He slept all day, only getting up in time for dinner. Even then, he ate very little. But, since the kids were at their grandparents' home, it afforded us an opportunity to talk about some things which required a bit of privacy. One that was foremost in my mind was to let him know that it was OK to let go. He doesn't need to "hang on" just for me or anybody else. We're all going to be OK and he understood/agreed. The hospice nurse wanted me to make sure he knew that since his will can be rather strong. Michael also told me that if euthanasia were legal he would have opted for it months ago. The poor man is suffering, perhaps not a physical pain most minutes, and he wants to leave this world.
Several nights before Christmas, I had to phone Hospice late at night because he was experiencing severe pain in his hands and arms. The nurse was at the house 15 minutes after the phone call. (I'm continually amazed by the care we receive from that organization.) Michael's experiencing all the signs and symptoms of congestive heart failure.
My prayer for Michael is that he can leave this world by simply going to sleep - it's what he wants - painless.
Martin was not able to visit on Boxing Day as the poor man is experiencing health issues of his own.
The children seemed to really liked the gifts they received this year. Andrea was overcome with emotion when I gave her my engagement diamond reset in a necklace. And, the best part for me is that only one gift has to be returned! My aunt and uncle in Memphis were thrilled by their gift - the Steelers quilt I made for them. Mom and Ken liked their new tabletopper. All in all a good gifting year. I get a lot of joy from giving people things they like.
It should be a hectic work week being the year-end cut off for our producers. Hoping to get out of the office at a reasonable hour on Friday since Andrea and Danny will be joining me for a dinner out at BD's Mongolian grill. Our annual New Year's Eve tradition of Chinese buffet is being altered since our favorite place closed and we love the new grill. Depending on how Michael is doing, we'll bring him a plate of his favorite sweet and sour chicken and then greet the new year at home. Boring yes, but enjoyable for me. Danny will probably leave our party for one more of his speed and Andrea wants her best friend to stay overnight.
I'll try to post later this week on my goals and hopes for 2011. It holds me accountable. For 2010, I wanted to become more active in the church and I'm happy to report that resolution stuck more than any other I've ever made. It's "paid back" immeasurably.
Love ya,
Cathy
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