Monday, March 29, 2010
I'm just about finished with the comfort quilt I created for a co-worker who is battling breast cancer. One more side of binding to finish......
The only other sewing I did this weekend was a couple of candle mats for birthday presents. They're next in the binding stack.
Andrea started her job training at King's Island on Saturday. We left the house in plenty of time with 15 minutes to spare. Good thing we did. Halfway home, my cell phone rings. It was Andrea in a near-state of panic. She didn't have her ID. I pulled over and searched the car for it. Found it wedged between the seats and drove back to the park. Crisis avoided! She's been assigned to a food shack in the water park, so she won't begin her job until mid May at the earliest.
We're supposed to go to my mother's house for Easter and Michael's already proclaiming that he won't set foot in Mom's church on Sunday for nobody, nohow, noway. You'd think one was asking him to hand over his entire collection of Johnny Cash CDs. For crying out loud, it's just one hour one time a year. Was there ever a more stubborn man on this planet?
I was looking forward to having Tattoo Boy and his girlfriend over for dinner on Saturday night, but they cancelled because Tori was sick. At least I got to see Tattoo Boy for a few hours on Wednesday night when he dropped in out of the blue.
Monday, March 22, 2010
TECH: Does Daisy have insurance?
ME: No (chuckling, thinking what the insurance Nazis at my office would think of me if Daisy
was listed as a dependent)
TECH: What is Daisy's date of birth?
ME: I'm not sure, but I think it's Feb. 19, 2001.
TECH: You don't know your daughter's birthday?
ME: No, she's a dog.
TECH: That's rather rude
ME: No, really, Daisy is a miniature dachshund. Look at the prescription - it's from a vet
At that point, the tech turned the tenth shade of red and laughed so hard I thought she was going to burst a blood vessel. Every question after that was amusing. (Does Daisy have any allergies; has she filled a prescription before, etc.) When I picked up the drugs, she had typed on the pill bottle: DAISY IS A DOG.
Wait, it gets better. I had Daisy's two prescriptions on the counter in front of the pills Michael takes for his arthritis.
MICHAEL: Who the bloody hell cut all my pills in half?
No, he didn't take any.
I take some pleasure in knowing that I don't have to coat Michael's pills with peanut butter and jam them down his throat!
Daisy's medication is now in another spot in the house and her breath smells like Jiffy extra chunky.
Michael? He just has to settle for water with his medication.
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
Monday, March 15, 2010
I also started piecing another top - using a strip tubing technique. This quilt is ultimately destined for the guest bedroom. It was a pleasure to find all the fabric I needed for this top already in my stash.
Poor Michael had a bad scare on Sunday. When he was in the shower, he couldn't breathe. Even with the oxygen, he was unable to get air - sort of like his windpipe seized up. He obviously panicked, couldn't call anybody for help. He sat on the edge of the bathtub and calmed himself down. I found him a few minutes later, sitting on the edge of our bed, obviously upset. He asked me to dry his hair for him, so I got the hairdryer out and did that for him. Whilst doing that, he began to cry. I held him for a long time. That's all I could do. His pulmonary fibrosis is obviously getting much worse and he's out of remission, but he won't go to the doctor's for it. I'm losing him and both of us know he doesn't have long.
Dear Andrea's feeling all this too - I took her to a therapy session on Friday. Neither one of us had seen this therapist before, so he asked questions about the family situation. I started to talk about Michael and the lung disease. Andrea sobbed as I talked. That got me crying. Try as I might, it's tough to keep from doing that. As much as Andrea thinks Michael's nasty and rude to her at times, she does love her step-dad. I'll need to keep this in mind from now on. Since her own dad doesn't have much to do with her, she views Michael as her "real" father. Until Friday, she hadn't verbalized that.
God's steering me toward my next path in this life and I firmly believe that becoming more active with church activities, including Financial Peace University, is going to help me in the long run. I feel a certain degree of guilt leaving Michael at home when I go to the quilting club or even Sunday School. But, I can't cut myself off now because otherwise once Michael passes away I won't have a support group or familiar activities to keep me involved. I think he understands that too since he doesn't ask me to stay home anytime. My dear friend at work told me last week that I can phone her anytime - day or night - if I'm facing an issue with Michael and need somebody. Good words from a good friend who faces her own hurdles with a disabled husband.
Sorry, this post is not very positive or uplifting.
We did go to the cinema and watched "Alice in Wonderland" in 3D on Saturday. Andrea's on- line buddy from east of Columbus drove two hours with her mom to go to the movies and out for a meal with us. Andrea met Ally through a chat room. Ally and her mom, Cindy, drove to Mason to meet us in person last year. During our chat, Cindy and I discovered that our daughters not only share a birthday - April 9, 1993, but we had our daughters in the same hospital! How strange is that - we were in the same maternity ward (didn't meet then though) and got together because of an on-line friendship 16 years later!
Didn't get around to building our Ikea purchases this weekend. Perhaps tomorrow.
Monday, March 8, 2010
Once he told me that if he had known he was going to become terminally ill five years into our marriage, he probably would have elected to remain in England. At first that statement made me feel bitter - as if what we had wasn't worth it. But, the more I thought about it, he was looking to protect me from pain.
I need to appreciate what I have and reconcile myself to the fact that whatever financial issues or inconveniences I face are but a small price to pay for what I received because of him. Had he stayed in England I would have been robbed of the one relationship in my life which has made me stronger, opened my eyes to examining things much differently and provided me with a love I'd never experienced before. I'm grateful he chose me and decided to stay.
Worth it? Definitely. I believe God brought Michael into my life for those and more reasons. So, I'm thankful for the last eight years and will cherish any future I have with Michael, no matter how short it will be.
Monday, March 1, 2010
I'd like to know why the weekends go so fast. Seems like I blinked and I'm back at the office again.
Perhaps it has something to do with how busy I tend to get over the weekend. Saturday found me spending time with good pal Linda at Fabric Shack and then having lunch with her at the Pioneer Restaurant. Linda's favorite Amish shop was unfortunately closed for winter - thus creating a great excuse for us to make the trip together when the weather is warmer. I found some wonderful fabric for borders on my Civil War fabric/layer cake quilt, enough fabric for a few pillow cases and for the heck of it more fabric I just liked and will eventually do something with. Also, picked up a neat little pattern for totes made with Charm Squares.
Once I said bye-bye to Linda, Andrea hijacked me and we were off to the grocery store with a side trip to Chipotle so Andrea could have her "fix".
After attending an information meeting on Sunday, I've decided to sign up for Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace University. It'll take two hours of my time every Friday evening between now and June, but if my learning is as valued as promised, it will be well worth my time. One of the reasons I want to take this class is to learn what I need to do to thrive financially on my own. Michael won't be with me much longer and we may never see any assistance from Social Security the way things are going. (Paperwork's in England with their worker's assistance office - no way of knowing when they'll get done.)
In between the shopping and church, I managed to get some sewing done. I'd pieced over 20 blocks for the quilt-as-you go pattern and realized I wouldn't have enough of one of the main fabrics. Got on line and found a store in Michigan that still had it in stock so I ordered two yards. Once I'd reached a stopping point with the quilt-as-you go piece, I picked up the Civil War blocks and got them all pieced together -ready for the borders. I have no clue how I'm going to quilt this one. Once I get my camera back from Tattoo Boy, I'll post a photo of this project for input on quilting ideas.
I mentioned Michael in the paragraph before last. For those who are interested, his health continues to deteriorate. He refuses to see any doctor despite the left arm pain and chest pain he's experiencing. He doesn't leave the house except for our once a week treat - a meal at a local restaurant. Then, and other times, it takes him a good ten minutes to catch his breath after slowly walking ten yards. He's on oxygen 24/7 (even in the shower) and had to boost the pressure. Most of the time he's in a good mood. But, yesterday he mentioned that he's frightened of dying alone. To him, that is THE end. He continues to be hard-hearted about faith and may never change. That, more than anything, troubles me. It is HIS choice, but I continue to pray and seek guidance.
Andrea has three more days of winter quarter classes. She is ecstatic about gym coming to an end. Her schedule for spring quarter is packed, but she's looking forward to those classes. Next on the list: get driver's ed out of the way.
I rarely hear from Tattoo Boy - except when he needs something like last Friday. He was searching for a bicycle he could tear up and use for another art project. Andrea obliged by selling him her old bike for $10. Hoping that TB gets his cell phone back amongst the living so I can get in touch with him more often.
TB's old room has been empty for a few weeks now and I've made some tentative decisions about fixing it back up into a guest room. For one thing, it's in dire need of a paint job and I don't know what TB did with the curtains that were in there. I suspect he tossed them out. I'd like to paint the walls a sand colour and use blue/gray, light brown fabrics in the bedding and curtains. Will probably get around to all this in a few months. We won't have guests for a while at any rate.