Wednesday, January 11, 2012

Muddling Through

Nine months ago today I lost my best friend/husband. In a lot of ways, it seems like he died just yesterday. But, in many aspects, it's been a LONG nine months. There's this huge hole in my life right now that I've tried my best to fill with friends, family, church, quilting, etc. These activities are kind of like pouring sand in a sieve; passing right through the hole. One of these days though, I pray that hole will close up. It's going to take time, I've been told.

It does not help right now that I'm dealing with my daughter's anxiety issues. Her so-called best friend has ended their seven year friendship based on a lot of false accusations and bitter, hurtful words to my Andrea. Anybody who knows Andrea knows she's not capable of the things she's been accused of. But now my darling girl is suffering inside - on top of her already raw grief. As a mother, I'd like to literally smack the ever-living crap out of the x-friend. But, as a Christian and in respect to my girl, I'm doing my best to steer clear of the brat who has caused so much pain. I'm feeling a bit of sadness about it too - the x-friend was a fixture in our family for years - she even went on vacations with us and told me I was more of a mother to her than her own mom was.

On to other "scum" - still no e-mail communication from the shop owner regarding my groovy boards. Jennifer, if you're reading this, yes, I would like the name of the shop you deal with - it would be nice to deal with reputable people.

During all the drama of the last few days, I realized it was time to see my doctor about my blood pressure - it's been horrible the last few times I took it. So, I have an appointment this afternoon.

One of my quilting friends came over to the house on Saturday afternoon with a king-sized top. We loaded it on the frame, I showed her how to operate the Avante and voila - two hours later - she was done with the quilting. She was amazed. I finished piecing a top - a kit from Connecting Threads with the Parlor Pets line - need to order the backing for it now. I also dug out an old project I started two years ago- log cabin blocks from the Judy Martin book. The design wall is now filled with the blocks and I'm making more for a "Sunshine and Shadows" pattern - appropriate, eh?

Well, the sun is not shining today in southwestern Ohio, but it will again someday. Of that I am certain. I'm reading through the Bible again this year. The chapter in Genesis that I read yesterday had a verse which said God can do anything. I believe that and with that faith, I KNOW brighter days are ahead.

Love ya,


Linda and Piwacket said...

I understand your hurt and anger, especially on behalf of Andrea. You are both survivors. Your faith is not misplaced.

Regina said...

(((HUGS))) on all fronts - and glad to hear you are taking time to take care of you and your health... here's hoping for a positive checkup on that. Sunshine and shadows is very appropriate - wishing you lots of sunshine ahead!!!

Jennifer said...

So sorry to hear about your heavy heart. Thoughts for you and Andrea and hopes for more sunshine ahead. My HQ dealer is Mike's Machine Shop in IL - here is his website